


The Spaces Between Us (are full of everything we love)

by lionessvalenti



Category: The Holiday (2006)
Genre: E-mail, Epistolary, F/M, Post-Canon, Yuletide, Yuletide 2011, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-24
Updated: 2011-12-24
Packaged: 2017-10-27 23:44:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/301389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lionessvalenti/pseuds/lionessvalenti
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Living with long-distance relationships. A story told through emails.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Spaces Between Us (are full of everything we love)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seawench](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seawench/gifts).



> I actually came upon seawench's Yuletide letter through a completely different fandom, but the prompt for The Holiday stood out to me.

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
date: 01/03/2007  
Subject: Heat Wave

Been back in L.A. for two days and the temperature jumps to 85 degrees. What's that in celsius? I probably wouldn't have given it a second thought any other year, but after weeks of snow in England, it feels hotter than usual. It's a welcome relief for me, but everyone else? Complaining. What do they expect? But that's L.A. for you. Everyone's so jaded and they hate everything.

I'm back to work. I don't know what I liked so much about it. I don't even know that I ever liked it. I liked being important and successful, but it's just a job.

Are things weird for you too?

Amanda

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 01/03/2006  
Subject: Lonely

I miss you. I know that seems obvious, because I'm sure you're sitting at home missing me too, but I spent all this time when I was with you missing you before I'd even left. I'd forgotten how lonely it is to be alone. I have this huge house full of stuff, but surprise, surprise, that's not keeping me company.

I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to be in love with you and be thousands of miles away. So I've thrown myself into my work because that's what I do, and it's not helping.

Email sucks. Call me. I don't care what time it is here.

Amanda

 

from: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: milesineminor@gmail.com (Miles Dumont)  
date: 01/04/2007  
Subject: A Brand New Year

Dear Miles,

Today was my first day back at work, and I'd forgotten how much I absolutely love my job. For the first time in years, I'm here and I'm happy. I'm so glad to be doing work I love and finally I can appreciate it. I'm not looking at happy people in the wedding announcements I write and wonder why they can find what I can't. That is no longer my cross to bear. I feel like a weight has been lifted from me.

Of course, not everything is perfect. I miss your company dearly. I keep thinking of things throughout the day that I'd like to tell you. I heard a joke I thought you'd like and now I can't remember it at all. Not that jokes go over well through email.

I know you'll be seeing Arthur, so give him all my love. He'll never get a computer, and the time difference makes calls difficult. As you and I both know.

Cheers,  
Iris

 

from: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 01/04/2007  
Subject: Re: Heat Wave

Dear Amanda,

Weird doesn't even begin to cover it. Back at works means seeing Jasper every day and I don't feel a thing -- except like an idiot for not getting over him sooner. He's ignoring me, which makes me believe he simply liked having me on the line and now that I'm not there to tell him he's brilliant, he's done with me. Good riddance.

I felt so complete on my holiday. I was at ease and relaxed, but of course isn't that how a holiday is supposed to make you feel? I felt like I belonged, but I feel that way here as well. Now I remember why I love my job. If you're not finding joy in yours, perhaps it's time for a career change? There's always work in London. ;)

Cheers,  
Iris

 

from: milesineminor@gmail.com (Miles Dumont)  
to: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
date: 01/06/2007  
Subject: Re: A Brand New Year

Oh, Iris, my Iris.

I have seen Arthur, just yesterday in fact. I played cards with the guys, and you know what rabble-rousers they are. I laughed til I cried, and then I laughed again. You were a fantastic topic of conversation, and I assure you, every word was good.

You have to come back and see us. Do they celebrate Valentine's Day in England? I think I read about it in a Harry Potter book. But if not, it's the perfect excuse to make a trip. A long weekend? St. Valentine's, it's a religious holiday. They can't deny you the time off.

Yours Truly,  
Miles

 

from: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 02/03/2007  
Subject: Photos

Amanda,

The phone call last night was amazing. I don't want to know what the charges will look like this month, but I'm trying to put it out of my mind. I do that a lot lately. Anything to focus on the fact that I haven't seen you in a month. But I think we're making it work. Don't you?

We had another snowfall, and I've attached pictures of the girls building a snowman and making snow angels. They were wet and cold when they were finished, but the pictures are worth a thousand words. I knew you'd want to see them.

All my Love,  
Graham

 

from: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 02/03/2007  
Subject: Dilemma

Dear Amanda,

I'm afraid I've put myself into a terrible predicament and I didn't know who else to ask. No one understands the situation like you do. I was shoveling my walk this morning (we had another snowfall; it's beautiful) and I realised that I love Miles. I love him so much, and we're such wonderful friends, but I'm afraid, after everything, I'm simply not _in_ love with him.

Perhaps if I lived in LA I could be, but at the moment, I'm finding a lot of pleasure in just being myself. I'm a version of myself I haven't been in three years and I love it. I may have forgotten this, and Miles, along with Arthur, helped me realise it again, but I'm a bloody fantastic person. I have a lot to offer the world, and I feel amazing.

But I feel awful at the same time. Miles is also a fantastic person and I don't want to hurt him. I have feelings for him, you know I do, but I'm unsure if they're what I want them to be. We agreed that with the distance, an actual relationship wasn't for us, but it's hard to pin down what exactly it is. I know it's a very special friendship and I don't want to lose it. But I know he's been hurt before, I've been with him when he's been hurt, and I don't want to be the cause of anymore pain for him.

I'm glad I declined the Valentine's day invitation. If I wanted to say this to him in person, I couldn't imagine a worse day. Do you have any advice at all?

Cheers,  
Iris

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
date: 02/03/2007  
Subject: Re: Dilemma

As someone who has been dumped many, many, MANY times, let me tell you: do not do it over email or by text message. Face to face is best, but since your options are limited, over the phone isn't terrible.

Relationships are complicated. What am I saying? Everything is complicated. Be honest, Iris. Dragging it out will only make it worse. There are very few feelings worse than knowing someone would have rather broken up with you six months earlier and just didn't know how to say it. Believe me, I've been there.

You don't think I'm there now, do you?

Amanda

 

from: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 02/04/2007  
Subject: Re: Dilemma

Dear Amanda,

No, I do not think you're there now. Every time I see Graham he's talking about you. I know he wishes you were here, and unlike Miles and I, the distance isn't too much when you're both committed, and I know you're both committed.

Thank you for the advice, I'll be taking it. It's going to be difficult, but I hope that both Miles and I can be mature adults about it. That seems unlikely, because I am truly the best at acting immaturely at completely inappropriate times.

Cheers,  
Iris

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 04/14/2007  
Subject: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!

There are not enough I'm sorries in the world. I can't even bring myself to call you and tell you that there is no possible way I can make it next week. I've got a backlog of horror films that need work. I didn't realize how far I'd gotten behind.

But I've sent Sophie's birthday present and it'll be there on Tuesday. Tell her she can open it early.

I love you.

Amanda

 

from: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 04/17/2007  
Subject: I'm sorry, too

Amanda,

I apologise for being a total arse to you on the phone the other day. You didn't deserve it. We both knew that these things were a possibility. You warned me of exactly this happening. But I still think we can do this. I'm not ready to give up on us just yet. Are you?

Your package arrived today, but Sophie wants to wait until her birthday proper. She keeps picking it up and shaking it, like she can figure it out. I told her you said she could open it early, but despite her excitement over it, she's waiting.

Call me, please, so I can apologise properly.

I love you,  
Graham

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 4/17/2007  
Subject: Re: I'm sorry, too

I'd call, but it's the middle of the night there and I don't want to wake the girls. I don't want our relationship to be nothing but us apologizing back and forth. Maybe we can plan something for the summer when the girls are out of school? The three of you could come here. I have more than enough room for everyone.

We can do this.

I love you too.

Amanda

 

from: iris.simpkins@telegraphdaily.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 5/22/2007  
Subject: Going to LA

Dear Graham,

I'm currently on a plane, on my way to LA. I'm sorry I didn't call, but it was last minute. I got a phone call from Miles. Arthur is in the hospital. They think he had a stroke. I have to go.

I'll be staying with Amanda. I feel like utter rubbish for seeing her before you get the chance to, but then again the circumstances are horrible. I wish you could come with me.

Iris

 

from: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
to: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
date: 5/22/2007  
Subject: Re: Going to LA

Iris,

Don't worry about my feelings. Call me when you land, and keep me up to date about your friend.

Graham

 

from: iris.simpkins@telegraphdaily.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 5/24/2007  
Subject: Arthur

Dear Graham,

Arthur is going to be fine. Well, not fine, he's 91 years old and he had a stroke. But he's going to make it through this and he's acting like himself most of the time. He'll be in the hospital for a while, and then he'll have 24 hour nursing care after he gets home.

Arthur is a wonderful man, and if you get to come out here in the summer, you'll have to meet him. The man who changed your sister's life.

Of course, I've also been spending time with Miles. I hadn't spoken to him in months and I'd forgotten how he makes me laugh and the way he makes me feel about myself. I love him so much, but I don't quite know what to do. He was exactly what I needed when I needed it. If we lived even in the same country there wouldn't be a question of what I want. I think he and I will have to sort this out.

Cheers,  
Iris

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 6/01/2007  
Subject: (no subject)

Seeing Iris again made me realize how much I want to be with you. Not how much I want to be in this relationship, but how much I want to be with _with you_.

I think I'm going to do something dramatic.

Amanda

 

from: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: milesineminor@gmail.com (Miles Dumont)  
date: 6/02/2007  
Subject: Us

Dear Miles,

I'm glad to be home, but at the same time, I'm sad to be away. I'd forgotten how much I love it in LA, and how much I love the family I've found there in you, Arthur, and Amanda.

I'm also so incredibly grateful that we were able to work things out. I hated not talking to you, even if only by email. I know how it feels to be strung along by someone, and I never wanted to do that to you. I don't know if I articularted that well enough when we talked.

Keep me up to date on Arthur. I have to get back to work. I'm dreadfully behind.

Cheers,  
Iris

 

from: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 6/05/2007  
Subject: Where Are You?

Amanda,

You're starting to worry me. You say you're going to do something dramatic and then I barely hear from you in days. You leave me messages when you know I won't be able to reach the phone. What are you doing? I keep half expecting you to show up on my doorstep. That would be a welcome surprise, but right now, I'd rather know you haven't gone completely insane.

Love,  
Graham

 

from: milesineminor@gmail.com (Miles Dumont)  
to: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
date: 6/06/2007  
Subject: Re: Us

Dear Iris,

You could never, ever string me along. You are far too kind and cool of a person to do that to anyone.

Arthur is going home on Monday and I'm going to hang out with him for a few days while he adjusts to having the nurses there all the time. It may not be the most exciting week of my life, but you know the conversation is going to be better than anything I'd get anywhere else, except for maybe with you.

I am a very lucky guy to have you as my friend.

Yours Truly,  
Miles

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 6/07/2007  
Subject: Re: Where Are You?

I haven't gone crazy. I just don't want you to talk me out of what I'm doing. I don't want you to ask me if this is what I really want to do, because you'll feel guilty or think I'll resent you because of it. I'm doing this because this is what I want to do. It's not just because I want to be with you more than anything, it's because this is the best thing for me.

I will not, however, show up on your doorstep without warning. You'll know when I'm coming. (You always do)

Love you.

Amanda

 

from: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 6/08/2007  
Subject: Re: Where Are You?

Dear Amanda,

If I'm being completely honest, I'm more worried now than I was before.

Love,  
Graham

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
date: 6/29/2007  
Subject: It's official

I just sold my company. Before you start writing a reply to me, Graham, let me tell you why.

Yes, it's you. It's you and the girls and how much I want to be with you. But even if you and I weren't together and if we weren't trying to make this long distance relationship work I would want to do this. Except I wouldn't do it because I wouldn't have anything else. I worked because I didn't have anything else to do. Nothing made me happy so I convinced myself that I could be if I worked and had a huge house, even if I didn't work.

I didn't know how much I wanted out until I knew what I really wanted.

I want to move to England. I don't know what I'll do there, but I'll figure it out. I want to live with you. I want to be happy with you instead of miserable here. I want my life to be there with you and the girls. I want to be a family, if you'll have me.

Amanda

 

from: grahams2@gmail.com (Graham Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 6/30/2007  
Subject: Re: It's official

Amanda,

When can you be here?

Completely crying,  
Graham

 

from: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
to: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
date: 08/01/2007  
Subject: Pies

Dear Amanda,

How much longer is this email good for? Will you get a new one? I keep meaning to ask, and I'm always forgetting.

I'm buying a pie for dinner tomorrow night. Should I find an apple one? Make you feel at home with an American apple pie? I'd bake one, but it's far too hot in my house to have the oven on. It's your welcome to your new home party, I thought I'd ask.

I can't wait to see you!

Cheers,  
Iris

 

from: awoods@woodsproductions.com (Amanda Woods)  
to: iris.simpkins@dailytelegraph.co.uk (Iris Simpkins)  
date: 08/01/2007  
Subject: Re: Pies

Any pie is a good pie.

I hadn't thought about my email. I was too busy packing and moving to a completely new country. I guess I should get on that.

I can't wait to see you too. Changing my entire life was easier knowing I was coming here to a family and a friend. You were the one who told me to find a new career if I wanted to. You didn't realize it at the time, but that helped. But you'll have to help me find one of those jobs in London you mentioned.

Thank you, Iris.

Amanda


End file.
